Observing More

Watching behaviours, and listening to the words emoting from others. It appears every generation has to come to terms with its own intrinsic and inherited biases holistically. As they have yet to make that holistic transition, maintaining it is moot; so, conflicts remain the norm, on the whole.


Curiously, this quote from the title character Miss Sloane, resonates for these and other times, and may be applied in numerous scenarios: “Career suicide is not so bad when you consider the alternative is suicide by career.”


It s about time, pal - enjoy this memorable day, C

F = T = F




Most of you may have heard the saying, “Can’t see the forest for the trees”, something somewhat understood without much deliberation. It is this lack of deliberation that keeps a repeating of bad behaviour and misdeeds that make for difficulties in living.


What do I mean by this statement? Considering the lack of consideration for the adage ‘form follows function’ that keeps many correcting forms when there is no following of the function.


Need examples? That which has sex-appeal but no real value after-the-fact, as in apparel that goes out of fashion; an automobile purchase that puts financial strain on finances for maintenance; a household purchase that appears essential biased on origin of purchase setting which blinds one to comparative personal environment setting; and, worst of all, decision-making that has superficial appeal but no real day-to-day social benefits to one’s overall environment.


In the preceding examples, are you able to insert your particulars or assert a deer in headlights stance in avoidance, denying what we have all been guilty, some more so than others? Especially, those of us in decision-making positions that have come back to bite us repeatedly from overt/subversive decisions? Whatever your response(s), fact remains we have all been subject to the backlash (benefit /deficit) of all I have asserted, like it or not.


‘Not seeing the forest for the trees’ makes us eventual victims whatever the outcomes if the least of us experience deficiencies that many explain as, ‘taking the good with the bad’. This the frame of reference, which makes accepting less than expected returns, a consumer mantra. Question is, for how long will this be our usual way of living?



1b. Close-Up on Water-Damage




There are those among us who do not answer the questions asked. They serve up statements in lieu of as answers that are palpable, acceptable to those making inquiry and listening to feel comforted accepting these statement answers, and being none the wiser of what is missing; the actual answer to the questions. This is evident to me but not to those on the receiving end of these statement answers.


Additional questions abound: were the questions so couched in subtleties that those statements are accurate responses? Were the questions ambiguous, open to interpretations allowing for such responses? Were the questions’ content lacking in sufficient information allowing the responder interpretative leeway; and/or, were the questioners vague and careless or simply naive, trusting the responders integrity?


Not so obvious matters to consider, but assessed in an instant giving way to future-presents actualities unintended. Something for you to ponder…



20. Not Very Fasnionable

Quiet Time



Don’t know/care the reason, simply sitting on a park bench out front of my condo building taking in the evening breeze ’n enjoying the fading, incoming evening light…


First time in 20yrs; but more accurately, the first time I’m feeling relaxed and comfortable in doing so in recent years!


I trust it is ongoing without the surprises/rude awakenings of my yesteryears.



5. Evening Descends 2 15.7.17


R = B(D+S) / W W E


[Racism = Bigotry (Discrimination / Segregation)  /  WorldWide Extinction ]


Are we of one kind, one specie called ‘human’? Scientific evidence points to this as a ‘fact’; however, longstanding behaviour patterns have demonstrated otherwise. There has been domination through enslavement, invasions and laws all the while claiming these as civilizing processes! But, are these actions humane when accompanied by subjugations of a greater portion of the specie? There is an obvious pattern of three-steps forward and shuffling-paces backwards.


There are aspects to condone and allow these actions through misinterpretations of religious doctrines which have believers at each others throats, while servile others observe decrying these behaviours afraid to step up and stop massacres taking place. Do you see any overriding patterns, or are you too busy hiding to notice the formulae noted above?


I was fortunate to have escaped from a rollover in a ditch as I was rescued by emergency service providers and passers-by on June 2016. I suspect reflexive actions as our occupancy was undetermined from the position of our vehicle. A far cry from other ’n recent ‘traffic’ encounters the police and black males are involved. It is most likely we were in need and could not be mistaken as threatening.


Not that the follow-up was a cake-walk, but things could have gone otherwise! I was in the US and the political climate had not taken the turn it has heading into its meltdown process. An infectious plague altering the national behaviour akin to dementia, schizophrenia and bi-polar disorders biased in its systemic history of bigotry, a definitive mental health issue requiring attention beyond depended pharmaceuticals!



3e. Sleeping Quarters During Balcony Replacement



A Fear Thing? 

Lately, waking up to a feeling of dread, an undefined feeling of fear causing me great consternation. This morning, it became evident my recent long term condo experiences left an indelible mark on my psyche of which I am tasked with correcting. The affair took 14yrs to resolve, 7yrs before a back-fired incident caused actual attention to be given, and I am now suffering PTSD-like effects. I am unable to act on decisions desired to restore my condo unit to its previous comfortable condition.


Very similar to what you may have read, or heard, about people caught in long term situations then got themselves trapped in unusual behaviour patterns. Not unlike being bedridden for years and having to relearn how-to-walk, or being discharged from prison after years and being unwilling to accept the feeling of freedom. I am given what appears a new start, but am stalled-in-starting. I am in a state of arrested development when it comes to what was once an easy task, also appearing as much to others upon airing my goings on when asked.



What I want to do is replayed repeatedly in my thoughts, but I am afraid to act on these thoughts. I acknowledge my feelings and their reasons. I am afraid I will get what was experienced as “surprises” over the past 14yrs, the first 7yrs descending into constant conflicts with board members and managers, followed by reluctant efforts which resulted in trial-and-errors issues after it was accepted there was a real problem and correction that required a special assessment procedures. After waiting my turn, correction occurred over the last 2yrs of the 14yrs, during which time it was hoped I would renovate and go away, as other who had such options had done.


Here I stay, amidst recovering from the 14yrs ordeal not knowing when I will assert myself in my desired direction. Making the effort to reclaim not only the level of comfort in my living space, but also my level of comfort within. The rest of the world makes its effort to reclaim its prior levels of comfort taken for granted, as I too am making similar efforts with no guarantee of success.


Curious, how my goings on are mirrored similarly, albeit not identical, on the world stage. We are all in the same boat where collaboration is the key to which adequate resolutions abound, but is being ignored for delusional self-absorbed purposes. Their insane but acceptable to greedy intentions never fails to amaze. I shall continue in my efforts awaiting my eventual restoration, trusting the same occurs in due time in the larger sphere. Time will tell if a balance, inside as well as out, will occur.



1c. Livingroom:Hall:Kitchen NE Corner



Strolling through Yorkdale Mall some 20+yrs ago, before the upgrades now in fashion erasing the memories of what had been, I needed to avail myself of the facilities nearby. Finding one with an easily accessible entranceway near a Food Court atop a set-of-escalators, near the northwest section of the mall, if memory serves correct became my focus.


I ascended on the escalator, saw the designated facility and proceeded towards it. I turned left upon entranceway, entering. I was immediately aware, and amazed, seeing no customary urinals exclaimed, “Where are all the urinals?”, as I walked about seeking an answer. It was then it occurred to me I was not the Men’s, where I intended, but the Women’s facilities! It appeared my ‘dyslexia’ led me astray once again.


Lucky for me, no one else walked in while I was walking about talking to myself. Even luckier, was that it was the 90s and not today’s environment fomenting all sorts of hasty accusations which could lead leading to hostilities!


What has come to mind is ‘how many facilities for Women are placed to the left while the Men are on the right’ which sets up preferential treatment and attitude functioning? And, where is the practice the reverse, have there been studies to note with what effects and/or affectations accompany this? A small matter, subtle in fact, but a definite consideration wouldn’t you say/think?




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