At the most inopportune times, I catch myself every now and then contemplating aging out. By this, I mean passing through a pleasing experience, not wanting it to end and wanting more.


Then, I think to myself, this will all be gone never to be sensed in this manner, ever again!


It becomes ever more apparent the importance of savouring this now moment; not the following passive homage to quips/quotes of other people, but the actual immersion into each imminent moment.


I do admit, it might be the temporality of it all that makes for these momentary specialness in moving on…




4a. George Gallegos- Carey Grant 21.10.17

George Gallegos- Carey Grant


Invasive Thoughts




While laying in bed some mornings, having assessed weak areas in this physical form, I wonder at the off-chance an odd Twist-of-Fate may leave me motionless and unable to call for help.


Then, laying here having timely bodily functions occurring, their odours and feel surrounding me in my sealed living space, until investigations from neighbours’ complaints facilitate me being found.


Question is, will it be days-weeks, or longer; and, will I be alive to endure the aftermath processes?


A tip of the iceberg conundrum living alone while growing older amidst privacy and individualism social dogma.


Whatever ensues, I’m making the best of Time being borrowed.




1b. Sunrise 2 - 27.6.16*





After much consternation, and results of many insights shared, some kept within, it is my belief there are those who have realized that we share many common experiences. In these common experiences, there are those choose to help others and those who choose to take advantage wherever possible.


I have accepted the notion that those who choose to ‘take advantage’ of others are Life’s indigenous teachers, some of us surviving/overcoming their lessons while others not.


My concerns are of those who choose-to-help conditionally by which many, like myself, become a member of the walking wounded. It matters not whether their ‘conditions’ are biased for benefit of self/family/friends/socio-economic/political positioning. What does matter are the results of these chosen conditions, because the walking-wounded ‘pay forward their wounding’ reflexively becoming aware if attending to feedback by their behaviour.


Most will, by remaining unaware of the types-of-poison they’re passing on within society, increase harmful conditions instead of the benefits learning/overcoming the choices of those ‘teachers in Life’. Conditions claimed to be ingredients of the belief system deemed, ‘survival of the fittest’ in the apparent self-perpetuating Free Market System!


My question is, how many of us are aware which type of person we are, and are willing to address actions outcomes once realized? The problem is, in our current ‘survival of the fittest’ system, how to survive the onslaught of the pervasiveness of ongoing wounding while distracted by increasingly sophisticated media-hype?


Do you know?



14b. The Aftermath

My Eyes Wide Shut


A  C  C  U  M  U  L  A  T  I  O  N  S


There are times when I take the time to look roundabout me only to notice that all my belongings grew into possessions, to the level of clutter accumulated over decades and I ask my self, “How did this ‘happen right before my very eyes’?


Was I so caught up in acquiescence to requests by others not to notice acceptance was tantamount to blind trust gone awry?


How did this ‘occur’ when there was no ‘intent’ or desire/design on my part to acquire any ‘stuff’, having lived a transient, gypsy-like life!? W T F happened!!?!!


Well, coming to an abrupt turn in the road I have been given the opportunity to take stock and discovered a 30yr collection, which has stories contained within each mound. A herculean task awaits and I must face what has gone unnoticed over decades.


Wish me luck, please.








Our ORBITAL representatives have gone into Space returning with an amazing amounts of information. Still our world population is none the wiser and fails to realize we’re all a part of the same ecosystem requiring caring and comprehensive collaboration/co-operation for progressive survival.


Those obstructionists who are unable to appreciate this Planet carrying on with Its holistic evolution ought to ‘get the hell off’ and allow those remaining to engage in these processes towards the Spiritual greatness awaiting!


Just my $0.02 worth.



1. Doreen Burke Palmer- I AM JAMAICA*

a  LEGEND  takes a  FALL


His day began with an impromptu tea ’n chat being sidelined which caused him to cast his mindset net onto possibilities flowing bye. He caught onto an idea and selected to walk in a direction that covered preferred activities of writing, exercise to an agreeable establishment which promised cordial exchanges.


He enjoyed a brisk walk into a kindly, engaging atmosphere. He did the writing intended and engaged with cordial people after commenting on overhearing their adjacent conversation. Looking out onto the street, the numbers of passer-byes had increased in numbers and frequency by their paces. He decided it was Time to depart into the chillier air accompanying the setting Sun.


His returning was to afford internal warmth to ward off the increasing chill of the incoming night air. A bonus for him was to enjoy two women ahead who drew closer relative to his warming pace. There was an interference by an oncoming woman did the ‘who-goes-where’ dance upon bypassing one another to avoid collision.


After their two-stepping and eventual avoidance of collision, there was an unforeseen event brought about by an unexpected condition. The City installed Accessible sidewalk gradients which he failed to adequately navigate resulting in his headlong plunge. Split second decisions were called for as he headed forward at an unintended and unexpected speed.


What was to be elected? Take the fall via self-preservation strategies learned during his decades of martial arts training, or protect the unsuspecting?


You see, opting for any kind of ‘roll’ would result in taking-out the women directly ahead of him, with them unaware of his position on approach behind them. Without Time to consciously visualize the outcome of his fall, a decisive call was required resulting in the women being startled and expressing dismay.


Their kindly concern for his position at their feet sufficed unaware of their averted potential doom. He looked up into kind, caring and lovely faces, and responded in kind explaining his ‘tripping’ process as an aversion of one mishap only to experience another. It appears a fall was in the cards


Undaunted, he looked back onto the woman he side-stepped, her disregard being unconcerned without looking back; he picked himself up, dusted himself off and checked for apparent damages. Finding none, externally, he went on his way feeling the internal aches brought on by his fall.


He proceeded to “walked-it-off as the saying goes”, psychologically preparing himself for the inevitable in the pain department; known and to become known, in the Passage of Time.




Accessibility Fail …





Ever had one of those moments beyond an epiphany, when what is going well appears as what IS, with revelations of actuality seen as inescapable and futile while being all-inclusive?


My apparent experiences, now and again, coming to terms with the actuality of Nothingness.


It’s been raining since last night, throughout the day and into the night-time, and it hasn’t stopped. At least, it’s not snow which definitely is on the horizon.


Synchronistically, the aforementioned is something I found implied in a recent ‘Supernatural’ TV episode, which I seldom watch: S13/E4; as well as, in a few of my other esoteric readings.



6. Walking on the Edge~ FtLauderdale Sun 18.10.17



Fast-forwards, then doubling-backwards, keeps in my mind how my ADHD has best served others within multi-layered challenges in the world of work, albeit unbeknownst to me at the time. 




Appears I’m being left behind with all the digital goings on, and I slip that much further behind as the years pass. So, as you progress, never mind be being farther behind because that’s the resulting consequences of my technological limits.




Harmony and Collective Consciousness, in spite of being desired are feared as shown in subconsciously-biased behaviours/gestures by the rich ’n infamous, alongside their enablers desiring to walk in their shoes, by and bye. 




Speaking factually, I’ve noticed that people often speak to where you are unaware of the processes behind getting you to ‘the when’ of where they’ve engaging you.

Much can be said about resulting conflicts and confrontations! If only this was made apparent, don’t you think we’d be better off? 




In Time…





I have been UP, and I have been DOWN, and both planes of existence are exclusive neither in appearance nor functioning, but by experiencing.


There is one thing I will say experiencing these states, and their in-betweens. The DOWN occurs more often than the UP, and from within the Down planes of experience there exists a cornucopia of revelations making one appear wise while appearing to survive being viewed by superficial plane functioning.



16b. Gladstone : Queen W c.12

C R ~ 2


CONTEMPLATING  FEAR               2.


To where I am going is as uncertain as my preparedness, since whence I came is fraught with adventures rife with drama. There were the emergence, a sibling followed by a separation, then divorce, which were but the tip of the iceberg; not dissimilar to many of you reading this journal.


Those earlier years were transient and any notion of stability not only did not exist, but also were the origins of my restlessness in later years. This trait kept me on the move, while happily exposing me to Nature as counter-balance. Amidst all the uncertainties of placement in home and family life, there was the addition of separation between age seven and eight.


By age eight, my younger sibling and I were relocated to live among strangers for a period of time, which amounted to four years. We lived in three residents with the guardian and a changing household in those four years to which a fourth was added by transiting to our paternal grandparents home. Our maternal relations were scattered here and abroad. Nothing was revealed in preparation for moving, but this lasted only one year and we were again relocated. This time a migration by air, an eight hour flight, reuniting with our matriarch to her matriarch’s home.


This reunion was an interim position, and we were once again on the move. In the six years that followed we were to experience five residences, after departing our maternal grandmother’s home. Thereafter, I relocated to a university out of town, which lasted one year due to inadequate counselling.


Returning from an unsuccessful year away, I entered a different residence. More transiency ensued, but due to early childhood exposures to unstable living this uncertainty was my normal in spite of how it might have appeared to onlookers. I was in that new residence for two years when conditions again changed and I was forced to relocate. There I was to begin the learning of the foundations to my early childhood conditions attributing to my restlessness, and other behaviours, misinterpreted by others according to their lifestyle biases. I unexpectedly resided there for ten years, the longest I had lived anywhere in my then thirty years of life.


Doing the Math: approximately ten locations in thirteen years in the country where I was born; and, in the country I now reside in, nine separate residences by the time I was thirty. The total being nineteen places-of-residence all told, with no one the wiser as Life had us all busy in survival mode while unaware of our similarities because of specifics.


Where the residences were concerned, I have slowed down with the motor still revving in other areas as I learn by and bye of other troublesome aspects.




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